A Sheriff in a small town in Texas walks out in the street and sees a blond haired cowboy coming toward him with nothing on but his cowboy hat, his gun and his boots.
He arrests him for indecent exposure.
As he is locking him up, he asks 'Why in the world are you walking around like this? '
The cowboy says, 'Well it's like this Sheriff ....
'I was in this bar down the road and this pretty little red head asks me to go out to her motor home with her. So I did.
‘We go inside and she pulls off her top and asks me to pull off my shirt... So I did.
‘Then she pulls off her skirt and asks me to pull off my pants... So I did.
‘Then she pulls off her panties and asks me to pull off my shorts...so I did.
‘Then she gets on the bed and looks at me kind of sexy and says, 'Now go to town cowboy!!!!!!!!’
'And here I am.'
Blonde Men do exist
Showing posts with label Texas. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Texas. Show all posts
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Tight skirts (mayor of Jotown)
In a crowded city at a crowded bus stop a beautiful blonde woman was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather mini skirt with matching tight leather boots and jacket.
As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on the bus she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the bus' first step. So slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver she reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg.
Again she tried to make the step onto the bus to discover she still could not make the step. So, a little more embarrassed she once again reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little more. And for a second time she attempted the step and once again, much to her chagrin she could not raise her leg because of the tight skirt.
So with a coy little smile to the driver she again unzipped the offending skirt to give a little more slack and again was unable to make the step. About this time the big Texan that was behind her in the line picked her up easily from the waist and placed her lightly on the step of the bus.
Well, she went ballistic and turned on the would-be hero, screeching at him "How dare you touch my body!! I don't even know who you are!! " At this the Texan drawled " Well ma'am, normally I would agree with you but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured that maybe we were friends."
As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on the bus she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the bus' first step. So slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver she reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg.
Again she tried to make the step onto the bus to discover she still could not make the step. So, a little more embarrassed she once again reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little more. And for a second time she attempted the step and once again, much to her chagrin she could not raise her leg because of the tight skirt.
So with a coy little smile to the driver she again unzipped the offending skirt to give a little more slack and again was unable to make the step. About this time the big Texan that was behind her in the line picked her up easily from the waist and placed her lightly on the step of the bus.
Well, she went ballistic and turned on the would-be hero, screeching at him "How dare you touch my body!! I don't even know who you are!! " At this the Texan drawled " Well ma'am, normally I would agree with you but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured that maybe we were friends."
Sunday, April 5, 2009
BIG BOOTS..
When they finally retired, Margaret and Bert moved to Texas.
It was time to relax and lay back and enjoy nature. They had earned it.
Bert secretly felt that a pair of authentic cowboy boots would just finish off the picture.
Then, seeing some on sale in town, he bought them and wore them home.
Walking proudly, he sauntered into the kitchen and said to his wife,
Notice anything different about me?'
Margaret looked him over. 'Nope.'
Frustrated, Bert stormed off into the bathroom, undressed and walked back into the kitchen completely naked except for the boots.
Again he asked Margaret, a little louder this time,
'Notice anything different NOW?'
Margaret looked up and exclaimed,
'Bert, what's different?
It's hanging down today,
It was hanging down yesterday,
It'll be hanging down again tomorrow!'
"WOMEN" thought Bert.
No appreciation at all.
Furious, Bert yelled,
'AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT'S HANGING DOWN, MARGARET?'
'Nope', she replied.
'IT'S HANGING DOWN, BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!'
Without changing her expression, Margaret replied,
'Shoulda bought a hat, Bert.
Shoulda bought a hat...'
It was time to relax and lay back and enjoy nature. They had earned it.
Bert secretly felt that a pair of authentic cowboy boots would just finish off the picture.
Then, seeing some on sale in town, he bought them and wore them home.
Walking proudly, he sauntered into the kitchen and said to his wife,
Notice anything different about me?'
Margaret looked him over. 'Nope.'
Frustrated, Bert stormed off into the bathroom, undressed and walked back into the kitchen completely naked except for the boots.
Again he asked Margaret, a little louder this time,
'Notice anything different NOW?'
Margaret looked up and exclaimed,
'Bert, what's different?
It's hanging down today,
It was hanging down yesterday,
It'll be hanging down again tomorrow!'
"WOMEN" thought Bert.
No appreciation at all.
Furious, Bert yelled,
'AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT'S HANGING DOWN, MARGARET?'
'Nope', she replied.
'IT'S HANGING DOWN, BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!'
Without changing her expression, Margaret replied,
'Shoulda bought a hat, Bert.
Shoulda bought a hat...'
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