A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her faithful, but very aged poodle named Cuddles, along for the company.
They have barely arrived when the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, Cuddles discovers that she's lost.
Wandering about, she notices a leopard heading rapidly in her direction.
The look in the leopards eyes show only one thought.
Poodle for lunch.
The old poodle thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep sh1t now!"
Noticing the unrecognisable remains of some poor animal on the ground close by, she immediately settles down to chew on the bones with her back to the approaching cat.
As the leopard is about to leap, the old poodle exclaims loudly,
"Yummmmm, that was one delicious leopard!
I wonder if there are any more around here?"
Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.
"Whew!" says the leopard,
"That was close! That old poodle nearly had me!"
Meanwhile, a monkey has been watching the whole scene from a branch in a nearby tree.
He figures that he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard.
He quickly heads off after the leopard.
The old poodle sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up.
The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.
The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"
The old poodle sees the leopard returning with the monkey on his back and thinks,
"What am I going to do now?",
Instead of running, the dog sits down with her back to her attackers, again pretending she hasn't seen them yet.
Just when they get close enough to hear, the old poodle says: "Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!"
Moral of this story..
Don't mess with old farts...age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill!
Bull sh1t and brilliance only come with age and experience!
Thanks for all the great jokes. They are funny without being stupid or vulgar -- in other words, just perfect :D
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